If you've read my dreams post, you know my desire to be a mommy. It's an ache that's lived inside of me for as long as I can remember. I've walked along some of my amazing friend's pregnancies and held their beautiful babies. I loved every moment and everything I've learned from them. But now, it's my turn. It was an early, unexpected, wonderful surprise. And it's my turn.
I always thought the day that I found out would be magical. I thought being pregnant would be complete bliss. I promised myself prior that I would continually be grateful in between each sick spell. It's been different than that. It's been the scariest and most wonderful thing I have ever experienced. I have had a couple scary moments where I have had to trust more than I have ever had to for anything. It may be the worrier in me, but it may be too close to home with everyone that I know that has lost a precious soul for whatever reason- and it's part of reality. I told someone "I can't wait until this stage of worrying is over, so I can start a whole other kind when my child is born". I wouldn't let my excitement pver this pregnancy consume me too much. Now that I have made it to my second semester, I feel a new sense of relief, with a smaller side of worry. It's like a new chapter in this new book I've been chosen to write. But it's hard to make it through to the next time I get to hear that little heart beat.
To get me by, I always try to remember to embrace my stomach, close my eyes, and whisper a prayer "Thank You for this amazing gift". I don't ever want to take this blessing for granted.
I always thought I would cry when I saw my first ultrasound, or heard the heartbeat for the first time. I didn't. I laid there smiling. With a giddy, goofy smile. It's so surreal. "Is that really inside of me?" Or the excitement of my midwife when she used a doppler to hear the heartbeat for the first time at 9 weeks. "Oh! Do you hear that? That's your baby's heartbeat! Normally we can't hear it this way this early..." Now that was a life-altering moment.
Now finally, pictures. This is from my "viability" ultrasound. Scary! But a sweet outcome.
Words can't fathom my excitement or my feelings.
Linking up Here
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What a great moment to look back on :). Congratulations!
ReplyDeleteAww.... Congratulations! I loved being pregnant and I completely know the worrying that comes with it. Enjoy every minute!
ReplyDeletethank you, thank you, thank you for linking up to my blog! i feel so honored. and may God continue to bless you and your pregnancy.
ReplyDeletexoxo.